These past two months my family and I have been navigating death and loss, one that came very suddenly. It was as if literally Life pulled the rug out from beneath our feet. It continues to feel quite surreal. Emotions have taken me everywhere, from numbness to sadness, anger to acceptance, love back to love. The peaks and the valleys seem a little less drastic, but they continue to come and go … especially in the quiet moments.
I invite them in. Getting consumed by life’s routines almost feels as if it is betraying what should not be forgotten so soon. Still my heart knows that it won’t ever be forgotten, even if the mind becomes occupied.
I have also remembered how experiencing loss allows my heart to open to our shared human grief. One’s own pain expands the capacity to be with other people’s pain. Rather than just a surface level acknowledgement, I am in awe of people who have and are navigating loss of all kinds … and the courage it takes to keep showing up in life, carrying on with one’s responsibilities, meanwhile the tenderness remains. The bravery that I witness is humbling, and at least for now I am less tempted to fall prey to my assumptions of what people are or are not experiencing. There is often so much more than what we see.
Perhaps the heart breaking is also the Heart opening, the field of Compassion becoming a little less obscured.