You Can Run, But You Can’t Hide
You can run, but you can’t hide. Sooner or later the truth catches up with you. I have found it’s ultimately easier to know and speak your own truth than to hide behind what appears to be good or right. Sure I want to be kind and compassionate, but at times all I feel is anger. I want to be generous, but sometimes I feel greedy. I want to care and be engaged, but sometimes I feel indifferent and lost in my own stories. These are the three poisons according to Buddhism. Greed, hatred and delusion. These are mental afflictions we are all vulnerable to.
Without embracing our truths, we cannot move forward. Instead we remain stuck. Stuck in a life that doesn’t feel authentic. Stuck in appearances that look clean, but are messy and absolutely human on the inside. Being authentic and truthful is the ground to start from. No truth. No ground. Say your truth out loud so you can hear it. Share it with someone you trust.
It’s like being a child who is taught to color within the lines. Sure it would be nice if all our drawings looked that clean, but it’s rarely the case. My daughter, Sonia, is such a great example. We all went to Pinot’s Palette as a family last year. The instructor was giving us step by step instructions so that the painting would look as close to the original as possible. Sonia followed the directions to a T until the very end. There was only so much of staying within the lines that she could tolerate. She finally took out her black paint brush and painted her heart out all over her previously colorful and clean looking painting. She had the courage to express herself as she was, instead of the clean appearances that were expected. If only we could all be so bold and so honest.
So admit to yourself all the ways in which you are not so put together. All the ways in which you don’t feel so kind or generous. It’s ok. We are all in it together. We don’t have to keep up appearances as tempting as it may feel. Once you can be honest about where you are, you have something to work with. Somewhere to begin. Your truths may look messy. Big deal. So do mine. It doesn’t stop me from staying on my path. In fact, it is my truth that keeps me there.