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Holding Space

Space is something inherently empty.  We choose how to fill it.  As a parent, lately I have been working diligently on holding a calm, serene space for my girls.  And this is especially difficult when they are frustrated or throwing a tantrum.  In that moment, I can either use my energy to feed their frustration with frustration of my own, or I can direct my energy toward holding a space that allows them the room and time to settle.  And when I have been able to do this, I have noticed time and time again that they eventually settle down, as long as I have the patience and the capacity to not react.  If I don’t  hold a space for the negative energy, that negativity eventually diminishes.  And this powerful idea applies across the board in life.  If you cultivate and direct energy that is self limiting and negative, that is the space you create for yourself and you may likely attract the same.  The energy that you cultivate today, in this very moment, carries forward into the next, into tomorrow.  It affects you and it affects the people around you.  Allow your practice, this life time practice,  to inspire you to hold the space that serves you.  This is the real essence of freedom.  It is a state of mind, not circumstance.

“If you aren’t feeding the fire of anger or the fire of craving, then the fire doesn’t have anything to feed on.”

~ Pema Chodron

2 Comments Post a comment
  1. Mo #

    really, really love this post. i try to practice this with my kids…with varying degrees of success. 🙂

    March 7, 2011
  2. Manju Jhawar #

    I loved the quote…..” if you……to feed on”….
    It’s really so true…… works….I see the difference in my life.
    sheils, you are the one….. u gave me this advise some years back.
    I am happy I took that seriously.

    March 28, 2011

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